"I have to say that the breadth and scope of [your] information is quite impressive."
- Dr. Bonni Alpert, director of Student Disability Services, Western New England University
"Hi there, Dan!"
"Hello Sue. What's up?"
"Can I talk to you a bit?"
"I was trying to sleep last night, and I was having a little bit of difficulty...."
"Oh - what happened?"
"That's some real rockin' music you were playing. Only when you were playing it past 10, it was still coming in through my windows. When that happens I have trouble sleeping. And that doesn't help me the next morning."
"Oh - I didn't know that. I'm sorry."
"I know what you mean. It's pretty tough to know when other people hear what you play - that's why I thought I'd tell you. Could I ask a favor?"
"Sure - what is it?"
"I'm generally home Sunday through Thursday night, and I try to get to bed by 10:30, at the latest, each night. Friday and Saturday nights I'm out late and by the time I get back you're probably asleep anyway. Sunday through Thursday nights could you please close your window, or turn down your volume?"
"Hey no problem. Tell you what. My window doesn't close that easily, but I'll turn the volume down. And if it's still too loud, go ahead and knock on my door."
"Hmmm...well, that time of night I'm not fully dressed because, well, I'm going to bed. And I'm not sure you'd hear me if I knocked on your door because, well, it would be noisy. Do you have a cell phone you could set to vibrate so I could call you and you'd feel it?"
"Sure - just give me a ring at (123) 456-7890. And I'm really sorry about this."
"OK, thanks - I really appreciate it! Have a great rest of your day, Dan!"
"You too, Sue!"
Wouldn't it be nice to be able to reduce problems, and quickly solve those that come up? Often it helps a great deal when you can get someone else to help you. Learn:
- Boundaries and how to draw them
- Seeing things - including your own words and actions - from another person's viewpoint
- How to figure out what's most important to another person
- How to phrase what you want in ways that make the other person much more likely to do it
- Effective compromise and creative problem-solving
- And much, much more
Last updated: January 3, 2016